11 March 2007

Okay?

Posted by Michelle under: Using Questions; .

I’m wondering how often I say okay with my children, and whether I have a problem with it.

“We’re going to get you dressed, okay?”

  • Is this simply a request for feedback, where the correct response to the question is “Yes, Ma’am”?
  • Do I use it for “event changes” more than “obedience commands” ? (We’re going to be leaving in five minutes, okay? versus Pick up your pajamas and put them in the hamper, okay?) I think I am more comfortable with the first situation and not the second.
  • Is this a bad habit?

Have to think about this.

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2 Comments so far...

Maya Says:

13 March 2007 at 7:05 am.

This is a pet peeve of my husband. I think I tend to say “okay” because I’m looking for a response; he sees it as checking if my request is okay with the child. I’m trying to work on that.

Michelle Says:

14 March 2007 at 8:37 am.

I am coming to agree with you both. Words have meaning, so even if we don’t intend to communicate a tentative question to our children, it’s probably not a good idea to say what we don’t mean.

However, if our children were to respond to our okay with a negative, I’m pretty sure we would say, “No sir, young man” and make them do what we want them to do. I think our kids must know that.) I say all the time to my husband “Does that make sense?” or “Know what I mean?” I think the function is the same.

So now I am wondering if a solution to this is to teach the children to “always respond” when mommy gives a command idea. (In our house, “Okay, Mommy” or “Yes, ma’am” is the appropriate response, but I don’t always require it.)

Thinking out loud…

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