Why Do They Fight?
July 2007
3 CommentsWhen this post was written: First child (D) was 4 yrs, 0 mo. Second child (B) was 2 yrs, 6 mo. Third child (L) was 0 yrs, 8 mo.
We’re actually in a calm period; our children seem to be playing well together, for the most part. And my current behavior challenges are bathroom challenges, not fighting challenges (including one child who doesn’t want to get up to go to the bathroom in the morning and is making a smelly place behind the bed).
This morning, though, David was looking at the news with me on the computer, and he wanted me to click on some explosion in the Middle East. Then he asked, “Why are they fighting?” I told him they were fighting because they were being proud and selfish. James tells us wars and fightings come from our lusts, our selfish desires. Solomon tells us that pride is the single root reason for contention. David’s eyes glazed over. I think I probably went into lecture mode too fast here. I should have asked more questions. Or maybe just a simple statement was all he needed.
Any ideas for questions next time this topic comes around?
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I think maybe asking why he fights with his sibling when they fight. I am sure that some kind of selfish or prideful answer would come out. I can imagine that my children would say something like….”because he makes me mad” or “because I wanted that toy” all leading back to our own selfish desires just like James says. My daughter (who has the hardest time agreeing to disagree) I could almost bet would say….”because he always thinks he is right!!” There is that pride Solomon speaks of.
Those all sound very similar to the reason why they are fighting over in the middle east! One of our biggest challenges in our house right now is fighting. Thanks for the insight.
1 Deidra said this (July 13, 2007 at 11:16 am)
That is a great idea Deidra…connecting it to why he fights himself. I think a simple answer is best as well, something along the lines of “they each think they are right, or they each want our own way…you know that is why the Bible says we all fight…pride and selfishness.” I have had to learn that my kids do listen best when the explanation is short.
2 Shelley Gallamore said this (July 13, 2007 at 8:48 pm)
Thanks Deidra and Shelley! More discussion is great! Any one else have other questions you can think of?
3 Michelle said this (July 14, 2007 at 7:22 pm)