I talked earlier about being slow to speak and quick to hear as a part of being slow to anger. And here about encouraging conversation instead of lecturing. I’ve been thinking lately that I need to be slow to speak for another reason: I’m interfering with my children’s ability to solve their problems. Typically, I [...]

Filed under: Getting Along

David came to me this morning, troubled. It seems that the girls were playing right outside his door this morning, hoping he would wake up and play with them. He was certain they had come into his room, and was bothered that they denied it. He was sleepy and grouchy. So he cuddled up in [...]

Filed under: Getting Along

I’ve been thinking about my desire to be more patient with my children. I’ve been praying about it, but then I started thinking more deeply (forgive me– I think more at certain times of the month!) Is prayer the only thing I can do to be more patient? We talked a little bit about teamwork, [...]

Filed under: Emotions, Getting Along

What’s going on biblically when children complain about something not being fair? Lee had a good discussion with one of our children, who was concerned about fairness when a sibling had computer time that neither of the other two siblings received. Lee mentioned later that people overly concerned with “fairness” are often simply envious. That was [...]

Filed under: Getting Along

We’ve really been talking a lot at our house about how love sees things in the best light. That’s because children (and adults, too) naturally don’t give people the benefit of the doubt. Lately we’ve had a lot of conflict (instant screaming, instant hurt feelings, instant anger) simply because a child assumed something untrue. A [...]

Filed under: Getting Along

Surely the churning of milk bringeth forth butter, and the wringing of the nose bringeth forth blood: so the forcing of wrath bringeth forth strife. Proverbs 30:33 I read this verse yesterday morning and decided it would make a fun object lesson. Forcing wrath sounds a lot like provoking and teasing to me– so yesterday [...]

Tags: object lesson
Filed under: Getting Along

I’ve been thinking about the skills and knowledge my children will need as adults– problem solving, communication, and so on– that will help them as they leave our home to have their own families. When my children have difficulty with teasing, I’m thinking about how that problem is manifested in adulthood. This is why when [...]

Filed under: Getting Along

Last week, I mentioned that our children tease too much– unkindly– in spite of our best efforts to stop it. The things we’ve done to teach and train them have been good things to do. We’ve seen improvements. But we’re not finished with learning and teaching. I mentioned that I started (again) trying to understand [...]

Tags: teasing
Filed under: Getting Along

I’ve been dissatisfied with my attempts to respond to my children when they tease. We’ve tried a lot of approaches. I’ve talked about loving. About preferring one another. About the mad man who says “I’m just joking.” I’ve talked about how teasing is only fun when everyone is having fun. (I’ve given that lecture repeatedly.) [...]

Filed under: Child Development, Getting Along

Lately, I’ve been thinking about how my children respond to sinning siblings and friends. When we sat at lunch last week, I spent some time talking about the responsibility a mom and a dad have to teach and discipline their children. (I’m really interested in their responsibility, but talking about something they need to know [...]

Filed under: Getting Along, Humility