As4Me

Bethel, was pushing your brother kind?
No.
Was pushing your brother glorifying God?
[brightly] Yes.
No. It does not glorify God when we are unkind. What should you say to your brother?
Yes, ma’am.
No, what should you say when you are unkind?
Please stop.
No. You should say, “Please forgive me for being unkind.”
Forgive me for being unkind.
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I found a new verse that seems to be helpful in establishing a Christian World View. It’s a “do” verse, not a “God is” verse, but it did make a difference today.
For some reason, Bethel told David “I’m mad at you.” It seems to be the insult of choice right now at our house. Predictably, [...]

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We’re actually in a calm period; our children seem to be playing well together, for the most part. And my current behavior challenges are bathroom challenges, not fighting challenges (including one child who doesn’t want to get up to go to the bathroom in the morning and is making a smelly place behind the [...]

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One of the lessons I want our children to learn is how to choose wise friends. This is not something I believe is a “neutral” foundation. If I wait until my children are junior high or high school to start teaching them about choosing friends, it will be a much more difficult lesson to learn.
So [...]

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I wanted to talk about the fruit of the Spirit yesterday. David was having a tough time being patient with his sister. Several times he became angry when she didn’t move out of the way fast enough. But I didn’t know how to explain the fruit of the Spirit. He’s not saved, so all [...]

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I had an epiphany in St. Louis about something I heard Ted Tripp say on his videos. It’s bugged me for a few years now. He says something negative about parents who solve their children’s arguments by asking “who had it first?” I believe his point was, we should instead teach our children that it [...]

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When an offense is unintended (as far as I can tell), and Bethel is crying “David knocked me down!” I usually tell David what to say, if  he hasn’t already said it.
Say “I’m sorry. Are you okay?” Give Bethel a hug so she knows you’re not upset with her.
When an offense is intended (being mean, [...]

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Lee and I were discussing tattling the other night. He mentioned that there are other motivations besides anger for tattling. For example, some children tattle simply because they have a sense of justice (i.e., I cannot allow anyone else to do anything wrong). If you know a child who has Asperger’s Syndrome, you have probably [...]

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Watching the older children at our house yesterday gave me some insight into at least some kinds of tattling. I have wondered how to deal with tattling, since there are times when you want children to tell. It seems daunting to try to teach your child when to tattle and when not to tattle. It [...]

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It’s a great illustration, really. It came from a little out-of-print booklet called “Your Reactions Are Showing.” Basically, it goes like this: You don’t really know what’s in the tea bag until you put it in hot water. The hot water doesn’t “make” tea; it simply draws the flavor out of the tea in the [...]

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