30June2008

Breakfast Curiosity

Posted by Michelle under: Family Devotions.

This morning at breakfast, I had pretty much decided that I wasn’t going to bother having a Bible discussion. But Bethel asked if I would talk about the kings we talked about “last night” (it takes awhile to understand their lack of time sense). I was surprised and pleased. So I explained how Israel was divided into two countries long ago. We talked a little bit about Asa and Ahab, and I read several portions of Scripture that narrate the story.

David finished his cereal, and I told him he could be excused, but he stayed around, in his low-key manner. At one point, he said, “You’re reading a long time!” and I figured he’d probably get up to go play. I just said, “I am. I like this part, and Bethel and Laurel want to hear it. You can go wash your bowl if you like.” Still he stayed, and I thanked the Lord for the small indicator that He is drawing these children to Himself.

Eventually we all finished eating and reading and talking. It was a good morning.

Popularity: 31% [?]

Popularity: 31% [?]

19April2008

Four Parenting Links

Posted by Michelle under: Child Development; Family Devotions; Obedience.

Four links for today:

The first two are by occasional commenters at As4Me.

Addy writes about repetition in teaching children. I had missed the article she references, so I was thankful she shared its significance to child rearing.

Jay Younts asks how we can teach our children to have an intimate relationship with God. He states the very goal is an important first step. I thought his examples were excellent.

Here is a link on 10 Ways to Help Your Child Love Missions at the Desiring God (John Piper) website. I need to read this article often. I think the ideas are excellent and go a little beyond the typical recommendations I’ve seen. Maybe it’s just good writing.

Finally, in light of our discussions on children and salvation at the Thursday morning Bible study, here is a relevant link discussing when to allow children to be baptized. Bonus posts: See also the earlier posts on evangelizing our children in part one and two.

Popularity: 42% [?]

Popularity: 42% [?]

24March2008

What We Did For Easter

Posted by Michelle under: Discipleship; Family Devotions.

(An interruption to the normal blogging train of thought, since I want to remember.)

A few weeks ago, I started playing and singing songs about the cross and the resurrection. I was a little worried, because all the children seemed to know about Easter was bunnies and egg hunts. It’s hard not to get excited when people around you are talking about candy and bunnies.

We could have left out the candy and easter egg hunt, but in the end we decided that it might actually help us make Resurrection Sunday memorable. I started talking about the cross. We talked about the crown of thorns, and that made a big impression on Bethel. I reminded them about the mesquite bushes we avoid when we go hiking. They have two inch thorns all over the branches, and it wasn’t hard for them to understand how that hurt. Anytime after this discussion, when I asked about why we were celebrating Easter, Bethel brought up the thorns.

It was helpful that in the Bible story book we’re using at the moment (Leading Little Ones to God), Lee read the lessons on the cross and resurrection the week right before Easter. So we had some formal discussions, but also some informal discussions.

At the last minute I decided to make a big meal. I was a little ambitious, but I got the children helping (since my goal was for the day to be memorable, I wanted to make them as much a part as I could). I was making some odd dishes, so I added a Jello salad (just layers of Jello in colors the children picked out).

I had the children make name cards for the table, and told them to draw pictures that reminded them of Easter. They suggested bunnies and eggs. Sigh. But I told them that those don’t remind us of the cross and the resurrection, and then they started thinking right: a cross, a crown of thorns (Bethel’s suggestion), a tomb (David’s suggestion, since he thinks tombs are cool). I suggested that they draw a lamb, and David asked why. That gave a good opportunity to stumble over trying to explain in simple language how God’s people killed a lamb to cover their sins, and to remind them that God would send someone who would die and make a way for their sins to be taken away. David didn’t tell me to stop, so I think he was interested.

Easter morning we have a sunrise service, outside, and we went. It’s cold at the foot of the mountains. That’s one way to make it memorable. The only problem was that I forgot the children’s coats, and it was hard to keep the blankets on them. Then Laurel was fretful, partly because she resented my fuzzy blanket and wanted hers, the one I forgot with the coats. Then Bethel had to go potty… we didn’t make it on time. So the morning service wasn’t memorable like I would like it to be, but there’s really no way to tell what seed fell on good soil.

I had to remind myself that it is the message, not the feeble messenger, that is important. It’s easy to think that my children’s spiritual growth is entirely dependent on my explanations, my feeble attempts to talk easily and naturally about God, my ability to see Scripture applied to everyday life. These tasks I am told to do, learning as I practice what works best, but when I feel inadequate for the task I must remember it is the gospel that is the power to save, not the earthen vessel.

For God, who commanded the light to shine out of darkness, hath shined in our hearts, to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ. But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellency of the power may be of God, and not of us. II Corinthians 4:6-7

Not that we are sufficient of ourselves to think any thing as of ourselves; but our sufficiency is of God; Who also hath made us able ministers of the new testament II Corinthians 3:5-6

And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ’s sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong. II Corinthians 12:9-10

Popularity: 20% [?]

Popularity: 20% [?]

7February2008

When They Don’t Want to Listen

Posted by Michelle under: Discipleship; Introspection; Scripture Memory.

A Conversation:

Me: Did you know that there’s something else God says makes us happy?
Child: Mom, I don’t really want you to read to me.
Me: [okay, that's fine. I'll just tell another child.] Did you know that there’s something else God says makes us happy? God says finding wisdom makes us happy.
(”Happy is the man that findeth wisdom, and the man that getteth understanding.” Proverbs 3:19)

End of conversation, a little discouraged.

I’ve had these discouraging conversations before. When I do share something I find interesting, or something I think they will be interested in, they often don’t really want to listen. I have the best success reading during breakfast, while they’re eating, but even then they will ask me to stop sometimes. And the conversation I just related was while they were jumping on our enormous beanbag.

The introspection begins… Is it because they are unregenerate? Is it because I don’t read them the Bible enough? Maybe my casual, incidental approach to sharing what I’m reading is misguided. I’ve stopped asking, “Do you want to know…” because they answer no. Maybe I need something more formal. Should I stop sharing Bible when they ask me to? Maybe I should just keep doing what I’m doing, and ignore their objections. The baby won’t stop me from talking about the Bible. Maybe I should just start with her.

But, I am reminded that one child did ask why when I told them what makes us happy. I don’t think I’m imagining that. And, I did notice that they all (even the baby) enjoyed sitting with me at the piano while I sang hymns, and later singing more while they played with their toys. So maybe my efforts to share Scripture aren’t as misguided as I might think.

Press on! The one thing I know, is that it I won’t feel less awkward talking about God if I don’t ever do it.

Popularity: 38% [?]

Popularity: 38% [?]

18December2007

The Bible in Pictures for Little Eyes

Posted by Michelle under: Book Reviews; Family Devotions.

It seems to be the custom among some groups to sneer just a bit at Bible story books. Although I don’t think it’s wrong to have Bible reading time for children of all ages, I also do not think it is wrong to use written materials specifically designed to teaching children about God. In some ways, a guide to parents (particularly fathers) is helpful in developing a habit of talking about God. Fathers and children may grow out of these books, but I see them as having tremendous value when children and families are young.

We just finished The Bible in Pictures for Little Eyes once again. I think this is the third or fourth time we’ve gone through it.

I have the older edition, the one with realistic illustrations. I feel somewhat strongly that the illustrations should not be cartoonish, because we’re trying to communicate the reality of God’s Word. Bible stories are not in the same category as their many picture books, so I like for the illustrations to be distinctive as well. I’m not suggesting that children will be confused, but that I have a specific goal that is communicated best with realistic artwork.

Each picture comes with a Bible story that Taylor explains in simple, easy to understand language, without distorting the truth of God’s Word. I appreciate that Taylor does not add conjecture or imagined details for interest. When we first started reading the book, I was bothered by the “negative” parts of the stories. It seemed, especially in the Old Testament section, that people were always making God angry. But I came to realize that without God’s anger at sin and wickedness, the need for salvation is minimized. I have concluded that the book provides a good balance.

The stories are short, but they are understandable for a young child, particularly for children ages 2 through 4, roughly. Our baby (13 months) climbs up occasionally on daddy’s lap when he’s reading, but most of the time she’s in the room, aware of the routine, but not understanding the story. Bethel (three years old next week) understands some of it. Some of her lack of understanding is developmental, I believe, and some is simply a lack of attention. Having pictures helps, and I’ve noticed that when the picture engages her mind, she’s more likely to pay attention.

Finally, each story includes good questions and Scripture references. We’ll probably come back to this book in a bit, and read the Scripture instead of the story.

For now, we started going through Leading Little Ones to God. I’ll tell you what I think when we’ve gone through it a bit more, but so far we’ve been pleased with it.

Popularity: 28% [?]

Popularity: 28% [?]

6November2007

Teaching Thankfulness

Posted by Michelle under: Family Devotions.

Normally, I come up with stellar ideas about Thanksgiving a week after. I know I’ve thought about it, but when I did a search here on my blog for “Thanksgiving” (notice the search box in the top right hand side of my blog). No returns, so not only did I think about Thanksgiving a week late, I didn’t have the courtesy to write down my ideas for this year.

So I have to start from scratch. I do want to tell them the Thanksgiving story, so I might take some time to look for a good book or find a good website on the topic. (I had a wonderful one with illustrations by N.C. Wyeth, but the story was decidedly secular.) I’m sure there are a number of cutesy ways to have children be thankful on Thanksgiving, but I want to teach thankfulness rather than just give them a picture of a dog and tell God thank you for giving us dogs. I’m not opposed to cute ideas, of course, but I don’t want that to be the sum total of our Thanksgiving.

Guess that means I need to study what God’s Word says about thankfulness. Now you know what I’ll be doing in the next week or so. I’ll keep you posted.

Popularity: 13% [?]

Popularity: 13% [?]

27August2007

Child Development and Scripture Memory

Posted by Michelle under: Child Development; Scripture Memory.

Just about any time a mother talks about a developmental milestone in her child, other mothers compare notes.

It’s important that when we talk about young children, we recognize that there is an enormous variety of abilities in children, even when they have intelligent, devoted, and mature Christian parents. Just because my four year old is far from understanding salvation doesn’t necessarily mean I’m shirking my duty, or that the parent of a saved four year old is rushing her child to a decision. If my child can sing entire hymns from memory at a young age, it doesn’t mean that the next mother must also have a child with the same ability, if she did her job properly. These differences cannot all be explained by high expectations and a challenging environment. Children are different. And even though I know this well, have seen it in my own children, I still do what I know is wrong. I compare and despair.

Long ago, I thought all of my children would be extremely verbal from an early age. I love words and communication. I can talk nonstop. Wouldn’t it make sense that all the verbal stimulation I provide would produce children who are exceptional communicators? In fact, although they’re competent communicators, they are still very much at age level in their abilities.  Take for example, Scripture memory. I’m certain there are two and four year olds who have memorized long portions of Scripture word for word, without help. But neither of our older children are there yet. In May, our church memorized Psalm 1. Well, we started working on it each night after devotions, and our kids still haven’t totally gotten it. They’ve actually done great; they can each say it with about one or two helps per verse (usually to keep them from going off track). Sometimes they do better when they’re not distracted or trying to speed up the devotions time. But they’re not making any more progress so we decided tonight that we were going to move on.

Yes, it’s possible our memorization teaching technique is faulty. Maybe we’ll start a new passage and try some new methods. But it’s also likely that they’re doing just as they should be. In the meantime, we (me, really) must guard against imposing our own children’s abilities on others, or imposing other children’s abilities on ours. Learn from each other? Yes. Measuring our competence against other mothers, or against other children’s accomplishments is not wise.

I Corinthians 10:12 For we dare not make ourselves of the number, or compare ourselves with some that commend themselves: but they measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise.

Popularity: 23% [?]

Popularity: 23% [?]

16July2007

Money and Kids

Posted by Michelle under: Family Devotions.

I’ve been reading several articles on teaching children about money. At first glance, this would be a secular task. After all, principles of saving, interest, spending all seem pretty secular. Seems like the only important thing to teach our children is to make sure they give that tithe to God, and all the rest is secular. Aha! To the Christian everything is sacred. I Corinthians 10:31 says, “Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God.”

First, I want to consider my goals and later I’ll think through how I’ll reach them.

• I want my children to understand that everything we own belongs to God. This includes their toys and my special dishes that we share each week at Bible study, but it also includes all the money we find, earn, save, or spend. This is probably the most important concept for them to learn, and will affect much of their attitudes about money.
• I want my children to learn to be wise stewards of money, including putting money to work in the best possible way. (Parable of the laborers in Matthew 20)
• I want them to love to be generous and giving, and understand biblical principles of giving. (2 Corinthians 9:7)
• I want our children to see money as a tool to do God’s Work, and not an end goal in itself. (Proverbs 23:4)
• I want our children to be content with whatever they have (1 Timothy 6:6-10)

Can you think of any more principles or verses?

Popularity: 14% [?]

Popularity: 14% [?]

26June2007

Holy, Holy, Holy

Posted by Michelle under: Family Devotions.

I’m trying to follow through with my goals from several months ago, so yesterday during breakfast, I read Isaiah 6:3 to the children as they ate. We’ll talk about this verse all week. I decided not to do it before we prayed for our food, because it seems like all they’re thinking about at that point is food. Talking about the verse while we eat seems more natural and they get it more. It was fun!

It also bled into another goal of mine, which is actually teach David hymns and what they mean. It’s one thing for me to reject hymns when they’re above their ability to grasp. It’s another to be lazy and not teach them when they can get it, with effort. So after we talked about what it means that God is holy (God is different, God is perfectly loving, God does not sin), and after we talked about how the whole earth reflects that God is holy, and after we talked about how and why Isaiah said three times that God was holy (David’s interested in numbers, and for some reason the repetition fascinated him), I sang the song to them several times. Later that afternoon, I head David singing some of it. Granted, the song also talked about a bird and a rocket, but this really is something new developmentally for him.

[Long pause] I was so excited I forgot to tell God thank you until just now. God’s goodness really can bring us to repentance, can’t it? When I see God’s hand of mercy (like when somebody I need to call actually calls me first), it really does humble me. And speaking of humbling, when Isaiah saw God in His holiness, he fell to his feet in the realization of his sinfulness. I wonder if showing God’s holiness isn’t a good place to start in teaching our children their sinfulness. Maybe we’ll talk about the context of Isaiah 4:3 this morning. If we do that, I had better take some time to think about it myself right now.

Popularity: 17% [?]

Popularity: 17% [?]

18May2007

Parenting with Wisdom Discussion

Posted by Michelle under: Book Reviews; Family Devotions.

Yesterday we had our book discussion and prayer time. Our context for discussion was Psalm 78 (of course), and the problem we were noticing was that we weren’t telling our young children the praises of God, his wonderful power and mighty works as much as we ought.

We thought of two reasons. The first is most convicting: if we aren’t walking in the spirit, we’re going to have a hard time parenting right. It was this thought that gave me a wry chuckle last night. I told Lee, I don’t need wisdom right now; I need God’s grace to help me do right the things I know to do already. 

The second reason we’re not telling our children the praises of God is that we haven’t thought ahead of time how we’re going to do it. When you’re sleep deprived and distracted from very young children, thinking ahead is a very good thing to do. For me I think it is necessary!  So we decided we were going to get some verses written down on cards and read them at breakfast and take that time to thank God for some attribute– faithfulness, holiness, goodness, and so on. We’re compiling verses right now. Do you have any that you would like to share? Remember, we’ve got small children, so simple sentence structure is best. I think we’ll start with Psalm 100.

Now I must go. Lee’s home and we’re going camping for the weekend. We’ll be back Saturday night, so I might check in then.

Popularity: 20% [?]

Popularity: 20% [?]