12May2008

Teaching Preschoolers Purity

Posted by Michelle under: Uncategorized:

I’m wrestling with communicating appropriate ways of boys and girls interacting.

On one hand, I want to teach them the sanctity of marriage. It makes just as little sense to start teaching principles of purity when they hit puberty as starting to teach girls modesty when they suddenly look provocative in a bikini. I want biblical principles explained on a preschool level. Maybe I should start by looking at biblical principles, eh?

At the same time, I don’t want to make my children on edge any time they are near someone of the opposite gender. I don’t want them afraid to extend a hand to help someone up. I don’t want them squealing if someone hugs them. I don’t want them being rude if someone has a different idea of purity than we do (although telling somebody “No thank you” is going to be uncomfortable, no matter how kindly one says it).

When I was a preschooler, it was a given that I kissed only my daddy. When the pastor of our church picked me up one Sunday and said, “Can I have a little sugar?” I sputtered in his face. I didn’t know what to say, but I did not want to kiss him. I also remember getting teased by my extended family for kissing a boy in first grade. I didn’t really kiss him; I was behind him in line and kissed his sweater. He never knew what happened.

The problem is, the simple “we don’t do that” and “it’s better to wait until you’re a mommy or daddy” hasn’t been effective. The gleam in their eyes says “but it’s fun” and I know I’m not being convincing enough.

They’re figuring out the difference between physical affection between mommy and daddy, and physical affection among immediate family, and the physical affection among extended family. This is an extended puzzle for me. I do not have any quick answers, but I am confident that God will give me the wisdom I need as I seek Him first.

Popularity: 2% [?]

9May2008

Shocking Behavior

Posted by Michelle under: Getting Along:

My son yesterday called someone stupid. As far as I can tell, it wasn’t something like “I think playing princess is stupid,” which might be understandable. Rather it was something like “You’re stupid.” I was shocked. My child? We have no television. We screen all DVDs. We keep track of all their friends, and we do not use the word stupid at our house. Where could he have learned such behavior?

Here is the point where I should have remembered James 4:1: Where do wars and fights come from among you? Do they not come from your desires for pleasure that war in your members? It really doesn’t matter where David heard that particular word. He was angry because his lusts, his desire for his own way, was thwarted.

When the fellow playmate came in to tell her mother about the shocking behavior, I resisted the urge to intervene at that moment. I wanted to wait until we had some quiet time.`

I asked David if he did call his friend stupid, and he acknowledged that he did. I brought up Psalm 34:13: Keep your tongue from evil, and your lips from speaking deceit. There were a number of verses I could have brought up, but I had read that verse that morning, and we sing a song with that verse too.

I asked him if calling a person stupid is evil. Now, I understand that a good number of people joke by calling someone stupid, and would be surprised to hear the appellative defined as evil. In my experience, most of the time it is disrespectful, unkind, and hurtful. There is a Proverb that should be mentioned here.

Like a madman who throws firebrands, arrows, and death is the man who deceives his neighbor and says, “I am only joking!” (Proverbs 26:18-19).

Do you think that our dear son believed calling someone stupid was evil? Not at all. Unkind, maybe, but not really bad. I hope that we’re making progress here.

I am reminded of the need to pray for my children, to pray for their salvation. I need my own walk with God to be strong, like Jay Younts says here.

Time to get to work!

Popularity: 30% [?]

8May2008

Attempting to be Modest

Posted by Michelle under: Modesty:

Note: Yes, I forgot that yesterday was Wisdom Wednesday. I switched my schedule around and I got mixed up. Next week, we’ll be back on schedule.

Our girls wear shorts under their dresses. Partly they do this because hanging upside down on the jungle bars in a dress isn’t […] Continue Reading…

Popularity: 62% [?]

7May2008

Winning the Food War

Posted by Michelle under: Mealtime:

I’ve been thinking about how simple routines with babies establish authority and lay a foundation for teaching obedience later on. What’s fun is that there’s a lot of freedom in how we teach authority and obedience. Mealtime is one situation where we generally manipulate the environment to avoid battles, […] Continue Reading…

Popularity: 75% [?]

6May2008

Improvement

Posted by Michelle under: Uncategorized:

Sometimes I wonder if all the things I tell my children are making it into their heads at all.

I have to remind myself that we should not be
weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not. Galatians 6:9
Still, that’s on faith, since I […] Continue Reading…

Popularity: 71% [?]

5May2008

Military Deployment

Posted by Michelle under: Military Life:

Fellow blogger and new mother Chiao Chyi, is facing the first days without her husband, who left for Singaporean military training for four months. Those of my readers who are spouses of a US military member can understand a bit how she’s feeling about now. Feel free to […] Continue Reading…

Popularity: 62% [?]

5May2008

Are You Going to Obey?

Posted by Michelle under: Obedience; Using Questions:

One of the questions we ask our children is “Are you going to obey?” This question clarifies that the command is not an optional wish the parents are making, something especially important with very young children. It emphasizes that obedience is a choice, and it communicates my desire for […] Continue Reading…

Popularity: 78% [?]

4May2008

ADHD from a Christian Perspective

Posted by Michelle under: Uncategorized:

I thought I would mention that my pediatrician husband has written several posts about ADHD on his little used blog. There are only a few posts, so it will be easy to scan for all the ADHD posts (there are about four or five). The first one is Is […] Continue Reading…

Popularity: 72% [?]

3May2008

Feedback Wanted

Posted by Michelle under: Uncategorized:

I’m working on a page for new readers, with information they might find helpful.

One part I haven’t included is a list of popular posts. By far, the most hits are on What Children Eat, but that’s not exactly for spiritual reasons. Mothers worry about this topic, apparently. I’d be […] Continue Reading…

Popularity: 100% [?]

2May2008

Practical Tips for Protecting Children Wisely

Posted by Michelle under: Uncategorized:

A prudent man foreseeth the evil, and hideth himself: but the simple pass on, and are punished.
This verse is found twice in Proverbs 22:3 and 27:12. Sometimes it is not wise to engage our society; it’s wise to run and hide ourselves. If we assume that these situations will […] Continue Reading…

Popularity: 86% [?]