The feeling of incompetence peaks when bringing that first baby home from the hospital, and peaks again (how is it even possible?) when that baby is learning to live life on his own. In both seasons I wished upon a star (or prayed) that I would always know the right thing to say and do. No mistakes for me, please.
Not knowing rankles, kid!
But then I remember that God’s strength is made perfect in weakness.
And I remember the horrible discovery that I made when I asked my 10-year-old daughter to select a book from our more than adequate library. Reader, she could not. I discovered that, while every child needs a librarian to hand over a book that is exactly what she wants, that child does not need a librarian every time she needs a book. I learned the hard way that always knowing just the right book for my daughter, and feeling the deep satisfaction when my guesses are affirmed, was not in her best interest. Why bother thinking if someone else does it for me?
That event causes me to view my inadequacies differently now. I can help them find a good book, but I don’t know how to help them find a job. My children don’t always know what to do, and I sometimes feel incompetent to help them. Sometimes I do know, but in rare insight realize it’s not for me to tell them. Sometimes I haven’t a clue what they should do next or how. And yet, God’s strength is made perfect in my weakness. God knows everything, every answer, but he tells us to search for wisdom. He leads us in discovery, more often than not. I can imitate that.
Sometimes the right answer (I hate it) is “go look it up.”
Sometimes we discover why together. (Note to self: “Have you considered” is better than “You need to”)
And sometimes the answer is “I have no idea, but seek the Lord, and he will give you everything you need.”
Just know, kid, that you do not need all the answers.