I learned something new today!
Chapter 4 in Mom’s book is titled, Understanding Your Child’s Personality. At first glance, the material appears extra-biblical. In truth, the principles in this chapter have a tremendous biblical basis, even though they’re not given in the book. The teacher has to do the work to get them. (It’s one of the suggestions for change I will make in this book.) Mom’s biggest point is that by understanding our children, we’re better able to love them and discipline them. As well, it’s helpful to examine biblically what our attitude should be toward the circumstances we cannot change (like Moses and Paul), how we should view our responsibility as parents to provide experiences and resources (like friends), and how the Holy Spirit can transform a neutral (or in our eyes negative) personality trait into character that can be used for His glory (Galatians 5).
Lee’s aunt joined our group this morning, and said something I was excited about. I’ve been brainstorming to figure out how in the world our daughter’s care-free personality could possibly be used of God, and Aunt Sally gave one suggestion. She said that women who are careful about details tend to be stressed out when company comes, but someone who can relax and enjoy company (without worrying about the details) tends to make others feel at ease. Her strength will be an asset as she develops a spirit of hospitality. My heart leaps; she’s right! I can see Bethel putting people at ease with her humor and relaxed view on life. And I can also see that she very well might develop the ability to focus on savoring Christ above being Martha-like busy.
The discussion was helpful for me, because I’ve been looking at a personality trait that seems like a perpetual liability. Under the Holy Spirit’s control, it can become an incredible tool for God’s glory. That thought almost makes me cry.
If you’re interested, here’s the link for the book, Parenting with Wisdom. Scroll down until you see the title Precept upon Precept (the original title of the book).
Michelle,
It is funny…this making friends online thing…but I am going to assume that you are a little more stuctured in personality. :0 I however could be descibed totally by “carefree, chaotic, ADD and chatty” to start. And I have found that to be totally true…hospitality and big picture thinking comes very naturally to me. I am not good with details and as an adult have learned to manage that weakness. However, I see God use my specific personality traits every day and can see how he has gifted and equipped me for the roles I fulfill. And I have learned to respect and appreciate the more detail oriented people and consider them my friends.
I actually used to be afraid I was a ditsy blond; I no longer fear the truth. 🙂 I might be a little more structured in my personality, but I’m definitely not great with details, either. Bethel’s personality trait shows up the most as incredibly clumsy: she’ll trip over things, run into walls, and thankfully has a hard head and cheerfully bounces back with a smile. I just wasn’t seeing the basic personality trait God can use; all I could see is the bruises she gets from running into things.
I think it is huge for all of us to see our children and try to imagine the ways that God might use them or the things that they could do for the kingdom. The vision allows us to speak into their lives and challenge them to look for how God want to use them and seek His will for them. My grandmother told me when the boys were very little that I should tell them on a regular basis what I desired to see in their life – namely “you are going to be a man of God someday”. Then they will learn to expect that rather than learn to assume the negative they hear. A little “positive thinking” perhaps…but used for His glory. 🙂
I am finding that you are absolutely right, Shelley. I wonder whether there’s a clear biblical principle the “positive thinking” reflects? Any ideas?
Thinking on “that which is pure, lovely, of good report,” etc., comes to mind… 😉